A few days ago, I sent an email out that asked people if they carried over traits from their childhood into adult-hood. The response I received was overwhelming! People had and people were so excited to share their stories. I asked them if it would be okay to share their story here and for those who’ve already confirmed via e-mail, their stories are below.
In case you missed the email, here’s how it started:
When I was a little girl, I always used to play office and play school with my little sister. I was always the boss or the teacher and I would boss her around. Getting her to type up documents on the Commodore 64 or make her do homework out of old text books my mom and dad would buy for us.
I remember she was always happy to help out and happy to be a part of whatever I was doing. It made me feel honored to have an audience because, being a bit of a leader from birth, it was great to have someone I could guide through different things and watch prosper.
Today, the story isn’t much different. My sister and I work side by side in my office every single day, for eight hours each day, and we get to do amazing work. The only difference is that today, we do this as a partnership rather than me bossing her around… Although, sometimes I still try
This e-mail is not just to tell you a story but to ask you a question. Do you have traits in your adult life that you had so deeply engrained in you as a child? If so, I’d love for you to hit reply and share those with me.
To read everyone else’s story, just click “Read More” below.
Anne Asher – Generosity
I have always been really generous, and have often reached out to try to make a better world around me. My mother told me that when I was a preschooler, she had to stop me from giving away my toys to other kids. When I was in the 7th grade, I and several friends/classmates got together and created HOW which stands for “Helpers of the World”. We began campaigns to serve senior citizens, etc. Our school provided a meeting place for the little club and we met once a week until our interest in boys waylaid our plans.
As an adult, I’ve repeated the pattern. I have done fundraising, in which I brought in close to $1M for reading and character development programs for an underserved school whose students live in poverty. At that school and another I was a volunteer literacy tutor and drama director for student productions. I also coordinated a Tobacco Ed program, kickstarting the presence of an activist organization at a college campus. The program was really cool because not only did it seek to educate people on the damage of smoking to one’s health, but it also exposed the abusive advertising practices of Big Tobacco companies, such as marketing aggressively to children, and it worked to get smoke-free zone requirements on the campus.
Currently I am a part of the Cochrane Collaboration, another really cool volunteer organization. This is a network of medical researchers and just regular people like you and me. The researchers dig up the evidence about how well specific treatments work for specific problems. My job is to go over reviews, as they are called, and give a lay person’s perspective, so that consumers are a part of the process, too. The public is encouraged to access the reviews and to learn about medical treatments so they don’t get hoodwinked by doctors who might be only interested in making money. Each review has a “plain language summary” so they are really easy to understand. (http://www.cochrane.org)
Joanne Burgess – Insight, Good Communication Skills & Common Sense
Hey Erin, what a great question. And the answer is YES, I definitely have traits that have carried through to my adult life. I believe everyone has a role that they play starting with their family and this often carries through to other areas of their life.
I’ve always had a healthy dose of insight, good communication skills and a lot of common sense (although interestingly, I’ve found out that common sense isn’t so common! lol). Therefore my role growing up, was usually that of the problem solver or mediator. This has definitely carried through to my business life.
The most rewarding part of what I do is in helping clients solve their problems using my business experience, good communication skills and big picture thinking. This is particularly helpful in the social media realm. I think that’s why I am so passionate about it. Thanks for asking!
Long Huynh – Inter-Dependence
A trait that was deeply ingrained in me is Inter-dependence. At first, I thought that it was Independence. Throughout my childhood and adolescence, I was pretty much on my own. I had to. My father was not around, he was in the army fighting the war. My mother had a religious calling. I paid for my own tuition through college. I had no allowance for any kind of expense whatsoever. Yet I graduated with distinction, happily married, and had a fairly successful professional life. I attributed these positive happenings to the spirit of Independence that burned fiercely in my heart. Only later on that I realized that it’s not Independence, it’s Inter-dependence. I didn’t succeed on my own. I succeeded thanks to the help, support and contribution from others who received back from me something of value. It was not through pity or charity. It was though mutual benefits.
So … the lesson I’ve learned was that you couldn’t take anything for granted. You could count on someone else, as long as you prepare to give back something of value, if not to the person in question then to the society. That’s the Inter-dependence lesson.
Roz Fruchtman – Connect People to Make Them Feel Special, Remembered and Counted
I was an only child, raised in a non-religious Jewish household, in the Bronx, NY.
I was a victim of “verbal” abuse and made to feel unworthy. Because of this I suffered low self-esteem and minimal self confidence. In fact I don’t remember ever having a dream of what I wanted to be when I grew up. Thus I know what it feels like to feel neglected, unwanted, not remembered, like I do not count, etc.
When I came to the web all those years ago I discovered a talent for digital design. I am an untrained digital artist.
Today I find myself designing Judaic Themed eCards. In fact… my web site, Say It With eCards, is the only Judaic eCards site offering such a vast selection of Judaic Themed eCards for traditional and universal holidays as well as the traditional Jewish Holidays.
In “low times” I ask myself “why don’t I give up!” The answer is crystal clear to me…
My passion and goal to connect as many people as possible, and help them feel special, remembered and like they really count is fueled by my own early feelings of worthlessness.
With each eCard I design, I think of the sender, who picked out just the right eCard and customized it for their recipient. Then I think of the recipient, who gets to feel extra special, not only knowing that they were remembered, but that the sender took time out of their busy day to demonstrate how special they really are by sending my eCards. So it’s win/win/win for the sender, the recipient and for me, knowing that I made a small difference in so many people’s lives.
Diane Coville – Creativity & A Love of the Written Word
Although I had many friends, I spent a lot of time alone too. I was a very avid book reader. All my allowance was spent in Coles Book Stores. I wanted to be a journalist when I grew up. I was always writing fiction stories as a child.
When I became a secretary, I had little time to be creative. But since starting my Virtual Assistance Business, I now focus on marketing (a subject that fascinated me in high school) and I now have an outlet for my creative writing by doing ghostwriting and copywriting for clients, providing content that I then distribute through Social Media. The little creative bug I developed as a child is now flourishing in the work that I do for my clients and I love it.
Elma Mayer – Spacing Out & Tuning In
hi erin – what a great question!
synchronistically, i’ve been thinking a lot about this topic too, and have probably come to the same conclusions you have. here’s my story:
as far back as i can remember, i tended to space out in nature, and in solitude. i’d stare out rainy windows for hours, or go sit by the brook behind my house and watch the water flow and the light play in the leaves. my parents teased me and call me unflattering names, like “lazy!” they complained that i was wasting my valuable time.
today, as an energy healer, i use the same technique of “spacing out” to “tune in.” because of my childhood practice, i can now discern and shift subtle energy, heal people, teach people how to self-heal, and get paid for it!
i had no idea that as a child, i was actually doing something highly useful that contributed to healing the world in a specific and concrete way. i’m so lucky to have found the connection between a seemingly useless childhood state of being and an adult career and spiritual calling — many others probably have that blessing soundly beaten out of them!
i’ve been telling my kids about this recently — about how important it is to simply notice what you tend to do naturally, and how it’s very likely that you can leverage that into a life purpose!
